Dots and Stripes and Bits of Courage

dots and stripes and bits of courage

“Courage starts with showing up and letting ourselves be seen.” ~Brene Brown

From day one, I’ve never shied away from sharing juicy bits and plenty of inner thoughts. Maybe I’ve hidden behind a pseudonym, but every bit of what I’ve shared has been some part of who I am.

Today, I’ve shared two things that scared the hell out of me as a blogger. I talked about money in a way I’ve been taught not to because it feels like the right thing to do. Now I’ve shown my body in a new way. Because I want to be seen for who I am, and not just a carefully curated collection of parts.

Both make me quake on the inside, but both feel right.

Maybe neither benefits anyone but me, but maybe that’s okay, too.

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About the author

Kayla Lords

I am a sex blogger, podcaster, freelance writer, international speaker, kink educator, and all-around kinky woman. You can find me online sharing my innermost sexual thoughts and experiences, teaching other bloggers how to make money writing about sex, and helping kinksters have happy healthy BDSM relationships. I'm also a masochistic babygirl submissive with an amazing and sadistic Daddy Dom and business partner, John Brownstone. Welcome to my kinky corner of the internet!


  • You have a lovely body! From the time we are small, women (and some men/non-binary folks) are conditioned to believe something is wrong with us. That our bodies are not acceptable, they are not attractive, not worthy…etc. So we start fighting against our own biology and genetics to wage a war that really…we don’t tend to win long term (as all the studies are showing) I’ve waged this war since I was 9 years old…when my mother put me on that first diet. I’ve hated my body for 32 years…I’ve starved it, abused it, gone through disordered eating, bulemia, hated it, been anxious about it…had surgery more than once…to really…really reach the same end. This is my body, and even though I’ve done quite a bit of nastiness to it, trying to achieve thin and the American verison of “beautiful”…it’s not failed me yet. It’s produced three amazing little boys and it cushions the head of an amazing man every night. It’s not perfect, it will never be on the cover of a magazine…it does make it onto my blog now (hello anxiety lol)…because I believe all bodies need to be seen…we need to normalize all bodies. Your body is amazing, it’s done such amazing things, and it’s going to continue to be the vehicle that helps you to continue to do the important work that you are doing…so show that shit off! It’s a damn work of art.

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