John Brownstone is 18 years older than I am.
My father was 19 years older than my mother.
My grandmother was three years older than my grandfather.
In my family, age ain’t nothin’ but a number.
But I’d be a liar if I said I don’t think about what will happen as we age. When I was still “objective” about John Brownstone and questioning everything (just ask him, I really did ask a million and one questions), I wanted to know what kind of longevity his family had.
Because my family tends to die by their early 60s. Clearly, I intend to beat those odds but was I about to hand my heart to someone who would be gone in a decade? (By the way, once I realized the depth of my feelings, I knew I’d rather have 10 good years instead of nothing at all.)
His family lives long, loooooong lives. His grandmother was in her 90s when she passed away. His father still works full time and he’s almost 80. I like those odds.
But what will our D/s look like when he’s in his 60s, 70s, 80s, and yes damn it, he better be around in his 90s?
Will he still be Daddy?
Will he still smack my ass whenever I walk by?
Will we be able to get away with more because of our age? I always said I wanted to be an old lady that shocked everyone around her. Calling my 90-something year old partner “Daddy” would probably be shocking to the young whippersnappers around us.
I’m hopeful enough to believe that if we take care of ourselves, we can keep our sexy, kinky fun going for a few decades.
I’m realistic enough to know that it’ll change over the years. Our bodies will age and change. Our abilities will change. Hell, I’m sure our tastes and preferences will change.
Will he always be my Daddy? I think so, even if we shed those titles for something else.
Will I always be his babygirl? I have no doubt, even if he calls me something different.
Yes, our attraction grew from a love of kinky sex and a need for a power exchange. But we’re building a life based on our love and care of one another. If tomorrow he could no longer smack my ass, I wouldn’t love him any less than I do right now.
The same is true in 30 years when he’s the cranky old man telling those damn kids to get off his lawn.
The D/s is part of who we are, but it’s not everything. We know that we can get those needs met without the sexual component, if those are our only options.
We may have decided to pursue a relationship because of our kinky ways, but it’s not why we stay together. D/s is a powerful tool between people who need the power exchange, and it can certainly get you through hard times, but for a relationship to last, there has to be something more beneath the kinky fun. For us, that thing is love.
And we have it in spades.