As I sit here, with a collar around my neck and an assignment to complete before I can sleep, I find myself unequal to the task to convey this night. I have a feeling this will have to come in bits and pieces over the next few days.
Let me first say that I am safe and very happy. My Sir treated me like His slut, His whore, His queen. He checked in with me constantly, even when I was determined to take every bit of what he gave. He brought me to tears. He made me cum. He held me when I became overwhelmed.
I entered subspace and in my extremely limited experience, I think there may be layers to subspace. Twice, I found that I could not hold a thought in my head but I could sense everything going on around me. I could not move. I could not think. And I did not care. The third time, I was completely gone – somewhere – and when He brought me back, I could not walk, I could barely talk, and I trembled violently for several minutes.
Not everything we planned actually happened. But everything that happened changed me. I am not the same woman I was when I woke up this morning. I am not the woman filled with nerves and fears over what might happen. I am the woman who knows exactly what will happen. I know how my Sir will react and how He will treat me.
Tonight, I do not have the words to adequately describe everything. Tonight, I am His submissive, and I am happy.