These Rules for Submissives Apply to Everyone #podcast

Whenever someone sends me a question about D/s or submission or kink, I often have to let it sit for a bit. I don’t like feeling rushed when someone asks a question that is clearly meaningful to them, and I prefer to give myself time to think and come up with the most complete answer I can.

I should have stuck to that pattern for a recent question.

When a new submissive emailed me to ask what the rules are for being a submissive, I wasn’t dismissive (gawd, I hope not!) but I really didn’t think there was an answer. The rules for how you’ll submit depend on your current partner. They’ll change over time and with each partner you have. I am definitely not qualified to tell anyone what those rules should be.

Except…there are rules for being a submissive, a Dominant, or even just a good human (regardless of your preferred flavor of sex). Once I had time to let the question percolate in my head, they were obvious to me.

I don’t think this is everything we should all “be” as people, submissives or otherwise, but it’s a good start. Listen to the episode (or read the transcript) and if you think of any I missed, let me know!

From the show:

  • Kinky patrons are always welcome. Support the podcast through Patreon!
  • The sarcastic answer to the rules question is: whatever your Dominant says. The less sarcastic answer is: whatever you and your partner agree to.
  • In reality, the “rules” of being a good submissive are not that different from the rules of being a good human – with a kinky twist of course.
  • Be honest.
  • Communicate.
  • Show respect.
  • Have integrity.
  • Look for the good Dominants.
  • Be yourself.
  • Educate yourself.
  • Understand safety.
  • Never forget about consent.
  • If you have any other rules you’d recommend, share in the comments below or email them!

Listen to the show:

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About the author

Kayla Lords

I am a sex blogger, podcaster, freelance writer, international speaker, kink educator, and all-around kinky woman. You can find me online sharing my innermost sexual thoughts and experiences, teaching other bloggers how to make money writing about sex, and helping kinksters have happy healthy BDSM relationships. I'm also a masochistic babygirl submissive with an amazing and sadistic Daddy Dom and business partner, John Brownstone. Welcome to my kinky corner of the internet!

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