I spend a lot of time on Tumblr, I admit it. It’s become an addiction.
I got fed up yesterday and went on a rant (on Tumblr) about only seeing the perfect, beautiful, non-existent women instead of women like me.
This morning, I got a wild hair up my ass and posted this on Tumblr…
As I looked at myself in the mirror this afternoon while getting dressed, I became angry at myself. There was a time when I was loved by a man who thought I was beautiful. I sent him pictures of my nude body. He responded breathlessly – as if he’d never seen someone like me before. He saw every flaw, every mark, every scar, every extra bit of fat, and he loved me.
Why the hell am I so ashamed of my own body? I don’t want the man who would take one look at me and lose interest. I want the man who loves me despite my flaws and because of my flaws. I want the man who looks deeper. I want the man who appreciates me for who I am.
Now, I’m on a one-woman crusade to add reality to everyone’s Tumblr dashboard – at least the small piece of the world that follows me. While I was getting dressed today, I slid my jeans over my naked ass and realized my ass in jeans (or out of them for that matter) is sexy as hell.
This is what I shared with the Tumblr world tonight.
I’m far from perfect. But who gives a fuck?! Somewhere in this world is someone who will love me for all that I am.
My attitude about my body is changing, and for the better. No, I don’t look like the 20-somethings I see everywhere. No, I don’t even look like the 30-something women I saw at the grocery store today. But I know my own worth, and I don’t want the man who can’t see past the physical. The man who loves me will be rewarded with love untold. I think that’s worth much more than a tight ass and flat stomach.
You are so correct in every way!
Thank you! Hopefully this feeling will carry over into the future…I’m feeling pretty fired up right now…:)
Just think how far you have come
This is true…
I think you’re very sexy
Thank you…sometimes I see it in myself…
I am very overweight but I think I am sexy. Not everyone has to think so. It’s more of an attitude. Only you and the person(s) you’re intimate with have to think so!
Very true. I don’t know why I stay hung up on what other people might think…I think it comes back me always wanting approval…I’ve been trying to be a “good girl” my whole life…the difference is that I now realize that I only need one good man to think of me as his “good girl.”
I LOVE it when Cruel calls me his “good girl”! 🙂
Those two words do amazing things to me…I miss that most of all…being someone’s good girl…
I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Awww! I love you, too!! ((HUGS))
You are a crazy woman and I love you! Mwah!!!
Crazy?! Yeah, you’re probably right…lol
Love you, too!
Crazy in the best way.
OMG, you inspired a hot dream in my fertile brain last night. Jaysus!
You should blog that dream…or at least email ME!
You keep loving you! You deserve it! 🙂
Beautiful, courageous, confident, all makes you the amazing woman you are today! You inspire me Kayla! ((Hugs))
Awww, thank you! ((HUGS))
Kayla, you go girl! You are brave, beautiful and genuine and should be proud of yourself, always!!
I know exactly how you feel. You want the man who will savor the wine and not just focus on the vessel. Couldn’t agree more. You are brave and beautiful!
Thank you…I like that…the wine, not the vessel…
It’s been something rolling around in my head for awhile now. I ended up writing it as a poem on my blog. You should check it out – I bet it would hit home. 😉
I look forward to it. 🙂
Excellent (the photos and your words). 🙂
Thank you. 🙂
Thank you, thank you, and thank you.
I have been feeling the same way, every time I look at a blog with such perfect women, or for that matter every where… then I feel that my body is the most awful body ever. I might follow suit and go out on a limb and put my body out there as well. Again thank you and thank you for the inspiration.
By the way I think you have a very nice shape you should be very proud.
Glad to know I’m not alone…and that I can inspire you. 🙂
HOT damn girly!! to your words, your pictures, and your growing love of yourself! You rock!! Oh yeah!!!!! 🙂
Thank you. 🙂
You go girl! I like this new you….
Beautiful, curvy and sexy.
I think I like me too…:)
I stopped by and love your writings. And you look wonderful to me, both on the outside and where it counts the most….on the inside.
Thank you! 🙂
Kayla, you shouldn’t even call them “flaws.” Seriously. You have curves and swells and mounds and creamy white skin (just like I do, by the way). You are YOU. They are THEM. Fuck the rest and remember those who love every nook and cranny you own. 🙂
You were my inspiration for posting my pictures…not just in this post but in all of the others. I’ve always loved being your IBF and think you’re absolutely gorgeous – as an avid reader of your blog, I mean gorgeous inside AND out.
I’m happy to have you be a part of my IBF. Truly. xx Hy
Oh! And fucking gorgeous, by the way!!
Coming from a woman I consider to be incredibly sexy that is a HUGE compliment. Thank you, Hy. 🙂
Oh, well, THANK YOU. It’s all smoke and mirrors, you know. 🙂
I understand completely…I tell people I just know how to angle the camera…lol
My darling, you are beauty personified. I would totally want to be with you. I would.
You are too kind…:)
Yea pretty hot there Kayla, you sound hotter over the phone though. Keep it up.
I have lost 11 lbs in two weeks and still going. I am not speaking of you, I like thick women.
/blush…thank you, Vile. That’s very kind of you to say. 🙂