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I never considered myself an “educator” until the day Professor Sex called me one. When I protested, she told me not to down play my work and said that I educate through experience instead of research. She validated everything I do in about three seconds, and I’ve loved her ever since for it. (For the record, I already adored her for multiple other reasons, and after meeting her in person, loved her for new reasons.)
That wasn’t what I set out to do. This whole weird journey began because I wanted to teach myself a few (dozen) things. How to masturbate and orgasm. What I enjoy sexually. How to express the erotic fantasies that had played in my head for 20 years.
I’ve always enjoyed learning. If my bank account would allow, I’d be a professional student, earning degree after degree. What in? Who knows — that would be part of the fun, too! My favorite childhood memories involve school. That may sound sad to some people, but I genuinely loved school and am confused that my own children don’t. I can’t relate to that part of their life. How do you not like school?
I thought my days of learning were over when I graduated college, but I quickly discovered that you can (and should) learn something from every experience. Even if all you get from it is a “That sucked” kind of education.
So yes, learning about my sexuality and kink was what I wanted — even when I didn’t know that’s what I was doing. But sharing what I know and feeling the power and connection of that kind of sharing is what matters most to me now.
I don’t feel like a legitimate educator because I have no degree that proves I can teach. Helping the kids with their homework is proof that I don’t really know how, either.
But I think about things…a lot. And I tell stories…a lot. I make a lot of connections (right or wrong) about what I think things mean. Some people learn by example, introspection, and shared experiences. Those people are my people. And for those people, I have something to say and teach.
Which is what I do.
I don’t need validation to do what I do — share my thoughts and experiences in hopes that it helps someone else. I’ll do that even when no one is paying any attention. But to call myself an educator? Yeah, validation helps.
I’m not sure what I am in the kink or sex blogging communities, so I don’t give myself titles. It seems right to let other people decide what I am to them.
I don’t like to call myself a “sexpert” because I think that’s a strange title, but I let other people call me that. I still feel weird using the “kink educator” title but Professor Sex says I am, so I must be. (How’s that for logic?)
In my heart, I’m a storyteller who hopes people learn from my stories, experiences, and thoughts. I put the information out there and let people decide if it works for them. Over the years, I’ve managed to teach people a few things…and learn even more in the process which is how it should be.
Welcome to Wicked Wednesday where this week’s prompt is “education.”