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Things Dominants Do To (and For) Submissives

couple holding hands and post on what doms do to subs and for them

Several weeks ago, I saw a search term result for the blog of “things doms do to subs” and I was like, “Ohhhhh, they do all kinds of things!” But I’m only one person with one perspective. Don’t worry, I can tell you what John Brownstone does to me. Hell, this whole website is a bit of an ode to that.

What My Dom Does to Me

I love everything he does to and for me.

To me or for me? Sometimes they’re one and the same.

Spanks my ass, pulls my hair, fucks me rough.

Teases my clit and grins when I beg.

Roughly fingers me and rips the orgasm out of my body.

Makes me beg longer or tells me “No.”

Rubs my shoulder, pats my ass, keeps his hand on the small of my back.

Opens doors for me, holds my hand, and keeps me close to him.

Calls me “slut” and “cock whore” when he fucks me.

Slaps my face so that my cunt clenches around his cock.

Holds me when I’m scared and lets me sit in silence when words take too much effort.

Gives me rules and structure to help me reach my goals, but he also relaxes them when that’s whats best for me.

Kicks my feet apart, pulls my pants down, and touches sensitive parts with rough hands.

Lays me over his ass, spanks me until I cry, and holds me until I come back to myself.

Sits next to me in the therapist’s office and listens carefully.

Gives me his honest opinion and lets me say whatever I need to — even if we don’t agree and even when we’re stressed, frustrated, or annoyed.

What he does to me is also what he does for me. They’re one and the same. And most importantly, he doesn’t do anything to me that I don’t consent to. If I need to, I can withdraw that consent at any point. Knowing that I will and that he’ll stop gives us both the freedom to try new things on the spur of the moment. This is a byproduct of the trust and communication that we’ve built up over the years.

What Doms Do to Their Subs

But I’m just one submissive with one view point. When I reached out on Twitter, I received responses that all had me nodding my head or giving me new ideas.


Sending me to bed, no matter how whiny I get that I want to stay up like a big girl.
Making sure I eat my veggies by making lunches for me.
The cuddle after the torment, and kissing the top of my head, murmuring “mine.” ~@HannahLockhardt

Clearly we’re not representative of every D/s relationship out there, but it’s always interesting to learn how other people do their D/s thing.

About the author

Kayla Lords

I am a sex blogger, podcaster, freelance writer, international speaker, kink educator, and all-around kinky woman. You can find me online sharing my innermost sexual thoughts and experiences, teaching other bloggers how to make money writing about sex, and helping kinksters have happy healthy BDSM relationships. I'm also a masochistic babygirl submissive with an amazing and sadistic Daddy Dom and business partner, John Brownstone. Welcome to my kinky corner of the internet!

6 Comments

  • This article made me smile. It was really well written and I always love to hear about others in the sub life. ❤️?

  • Hey there,
    both of us like your article – got some ideas too. 😛

    We’re building BDSM guide, it’s still in the beginnings. You can check it out on our blog.

  • I’m just now beginning a new relationship and I haven’t been with anyone in over five years! I’ve never even had an orgasm ! He is a dominant and I’ve always been submissive and want to be because I know nothing about intimacy or sex my husband was gay! So therefore I need to know everything there is about this type of relationship! Ready to learn ! Please help me! He sent me your website! ANGEL

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