You know, I think I've done a lot of difficult things in my life. Divorce. Single parenting. Believing in love. Submitting. Changing careers. Self-publishing. Putting my boobs on the internet.
Some people can't imagine doing some of those things, and to others, it wouldn't even register on their radar.
Somehow the hardest thing I've done yet is tell the world that not only am I a writer, but I'm a writer for hire.
I quit my job on May 30, 2014 and haven't looked back. I don't get to write kinky fuckery nearly as much as I'd like, but I'm a full-time writer. I thought I was a digital marketer (social media, websites, stuff like that) - and maybe I am. But what I love is writing.
In the vanilla world, I write on all kinds of topics - real estate, auto loans, money, you name it.
My favorite place to be is here, writing as Kayla Lords. This is where I'm happiest and most comfortable. I don't pretend to be an expert on sex but I know what I know, and I'm happy to share it. For that reason, I decided to start marketing myself as a writer for the adult world. I even created a new page on the site:
For me, content is the written word. For others, it's pictures and video. And I know if you're reading this, you're probably not looking to hire a writer. But you might see sponsored posts on occasion. Adult-oriented companies want to get their brand in front of new people. I'm okay with that as long as it's clear to you, my beloved readers, that it's sponsored. You'll never be under any obligation to click a link or buy a product. If the company and I can't present something compelling enough that makes you want to go to their site or buy their product, that's our problem, not yours.
So back to why this was so hard.
Book publishing is difficult. As a writer, I create and mold a story into something that I want to share with the world in hopes that people will be interested enough to buy it. Good reviews often help sales, while bad reviews can kill them - as well as feel like a knife in a writer's heart. But I write knowing my style isn't suited to everyone's taste. I don't expect to be loved and I don't expect to make a lot of money. I write and publish because I have a need to do so. It's the same reason I blog.
Telling the world that I'm a writer for hire is different. I'm asking to be judged on the merits of what I've already written - even though it doesn't showcase everything I'm capable of. And the rejection is immediate and much more personal. When you're not hired for a job, you're being told by a company (or one person at a company), "You're not good enough for us." That's a hard thing to hear.
It's not stopping me, though.
I love to write, and in the vanilla world, I'm slowing making a living at it. Writing in this world, as Kayla Lords, feels more natural. I feel like I'm a better Kayla Lords than I am my own vanilla self. If I can write about real estate, why can't I write about sex? I've only bought one house. I've had sex lots of times. So much more experience. 😉
So there it is. The hardest thing I've done yet. I'm open for business, an adult writer for hire, with a limited amount of openings for sponsored posts (because I refuse to spam you).
Not that any of my most prolific commenters ever hold back, but let me know what you think - good, bad, or ugly.