Take a look at my most recent contribution to Scene Magazine! Show them a little love, and to all my D/s friends out there – let me know if you find any of this to be true in your relationships, too.
One of the hallmarks about Dominance and submission (D/s) is the power exchange, right? Whether you’re Master and slave, Dominant and submissive, whatever, the submissive grants power to their Dominant. The amount of power varies depending on the relationship. Bedroom D/s, a 24/7 relationship, a hybrid of the two – everyone’s experience with the lifestyle and power exchange is different.
There are plenty of people smarter than I am who write about the power of a submissive. A submissive has the power to stop a scene with one word. A Dominant doesn’t exist without someone to dominate. Submissives give the gift of their submission. I think many people in the lifestyle have heard those statements a time or two. I don’t disagree with any of that. But that’s not what I’m talking about.
The power I possess is unique to the relationship I share with my Daddy. I have the power to turn him on, the power to make him gasp or moan, the power to make him even more animalistic and primal than he already feels. Sexually, we arrive at another level when I release that side of myself and take advantage of what he allows me to do.
fantastic article and I agree with what you are saying. I view it as a gift. The sub offers and the Dom accepts. In truth it is about love and trust that I believe surpasses that of a traditional marriage.
I really liked you last paragraph “In that moment, I feel both powerful and powerless.” We all enjoy that in the D/s relationships
Knowing something intellectually and feeling it in your bones are two different things. I knew that the dichotomy of power and lack of was real, but I hadn’t felt it before…the feeling is a heady one, and I look forward to more moments like it. 🙂
Great article Kayla! I love when I have the power to bring out Sirs beast, only for him to take the power right back, and take what he needs! Heady stuff!!
Hugs my friend, Mynx
Exactly! God, when I do something that MAKES him growl? Unf! Makes me squirmy just thinking about it!
I love the ability to play and I can’t imagine a power exchange where I’d never be able to play or freely touch without permission. However, I can see where what I view as “power” to do that now is merely granted by my Sir until he, too, takes it back and dominates me. So maybe all along, I just haven’t realized that I don’t have “freedom”, per se, but a limited exchange until such time as he withdraws consent and I am then the prey. (Shiver. Which I adore) Do you think this dynamic is different because you are in a DD/LG dynamic?
I think the DD/lg thing plays a part. With my former Sir, he was Sir and I was pet…so I’m sure that had something to do with it.
But it’s also about people and their preferences. Daddy wants to be touched – he craves it, probably as much as I do…the nature of how I do things is probably part of our specific dynamic, but what he allows or doesn’t is about what he likes and wants as a man, first, then a Dominant, and finally a Daddy. But, I think he can explain better than I can…and I’m sure he will – when he’s ready. 🙂
The insight from you two is very helpful for us. Waiting to hear what SSir has to say! Happy Saturday.
Loved your article, Kayla.
always looking forward to more from you
((HUGS)) Thank you!
Beautiful thing is I get to be a good girl for my Daddy. In that role, I’m actually the dominant. I find such joy in making him happy. And he finds joy in being free to express his primal instincts with me. Unconditional love and animalistic fucking. What more could a good girl want? Giggle.