Sex Writing

Getting It Done #Writing and #Promotion

I’ve had a few amazing friends call me great names like “wonderful” and “determined” and blah blah blah when it comes to writing, blogging, and promotion. Thank you for that, but I don’t think that I do anything much different than most other erotica writers out there. But most people don’t even know what that means, so I thought I’d give you a glimpse into what my life as a writer looks like. I truly think most everyone can relate, but it doesn’t seem to be something we talk about much, so here goes.

Assuming it’s a weekday, I wake up at around 4:45am. I’m immediately on my phone, checking email, Twitter, and Tumblr, as well as sharing blog posts and article through something called Triberr – an amazing tool for bloggers, regardless of the topic you write about.

Daddy calls me around 5:00am, and we talk until about 5:30am. I should get up at that point, but I usually spend the next 15 minutes back in email and Tumblr, sometimes my vanilla Facebook, too.

By 6:30am, I’m waking the boys up, getting them ready, and we’re out the door by 7am for drop-off at daycare so I can make it to work by 7:30am. I work until 4:30pm, but sometimes don’t leave until 5pm. The boys and I are home between 5:30 and 6:00pm most nights. Dinner, homework, bath and shower, and by 7pm, I’m sitting down at the laptop. The boys’ bedtimes are 7:30pm and 8pm – there are stories to read, hugs and kisses to give, and blankets to tuck in around them.

Just before they go to bed, and definitely after, I’m in my blog, my email, all my social media, and I’m back on Triberr, sharing blog posts via Twitter. I respond to comments. I read what I can. I talk to people on Facebook and Twitter. I stalk Tumblr like it’s my job – I queue 50 posts each day for Tumblr – basically, I schedule them the day before. And I’m picky about what I post, so I literally skim 100s of erotic pictures each day/evening looking for the ones that speak to me.

I’m on Goodreads and Amazon – checking statistics and reviews. I schedule promotional tweets on Twitter most evenings, so that I’m free to just have conversations or respond to interesting stuff in the few spare moments I have during the day or at night.

I spend a lot of time talking to other submissives and Dominants, learning from them and building friendships.

And each night, I talk to Daddy for at least 30 minutes, before he goes to bed.

On the weekends, it’s only slightly different…

I wake up when my boys wake me up – usually around 8am. That doesn’t mean I hop out of bed, but I’m awake. My phone is in my hand, and I go through a similar routine for the weekends that I have in the wee hours of the weekday mornings. Daddy and I don’t always talk, but we do text back and forth.

The weekends are my times to really focus on writing. Right now, I’ve got several projects in the works – articles for Scene Magazine as a contributor, a short story for an anthology that I was invited to be a part of, short stories that I’m submitting for consideration for other anthology projects, my blog posts for the week ahead (always, always my blog posts), and when I get past the anthology short stories, more stories about Sir and Babygirl for my next release.

I also clean my house, run errands, make sure my boys don’t tear apart the house or kill one another, cook meals, do laundry, spend time with the boys, and work on my business website and my digital marketing business that I’m building.

Oh, and if you can believe it, I read every night before bed.

Most days I don’t feel like I have enough hours to get it all done, but I manage, usually.

I don’t tell you any of that for any “atta girls” or “holy shit, how do you do it.” I tell you all this to say this – you find and make time for the things that you find value in, for the things that are truly important to you.

For me, writing and starting my own marketing business are very important to me. But I have two boys to raise, a relationship to nurture, and a job to hold onto so that I can leave on my terms, not theirs. I used to say I juggled, and then someone said that I spin plates. Well, fine, I’m a plate-spinner, but I’m a damned determined one.

I wish I had more time to write and publish. I wish I could do that instead of go to work, but right now, that’s not an option. So I fit it in between everything else. And I make notes on my phone whenever great ideas hit me so I can go back to them later.

I’ve considered lessening my involvement in my blog, but every time the thought creeps in, I reject it immediately. Without my blog, I would never have considered publishing my erotica. My followers encourage me in ways that I can’t live without. I write for me, yes, but I write for you, too. I love it here. This blog is my home, and my followers are part of my family. I feel the same about Twitter, Facebook, and Tumblr, too.

So there it is. My story isn’t much different than most other writers who haven’t transitioned to full-time writing and probably some who have. If you’re writing and publishing, I’d love to hear what your day looks like, too.

And in case you forgot, this is what I write.

About the author

Kayla Lords

I am a sex blogger, podcaster, freelance writer, international speaker, kink educator, and all-around kinky woman. You can find me online sharing my innermost sexual thoughts and experiences, teaching other bloggers how to make money writing about sex, and helping kinksters have happy healthy BDSM relationships. I'm also a masochistic babygirl submissive with an amazing and sadistic Daddy Dom and business partner, John Brownstone. Welcome to my kinky corner of the internet!


  • Up at 5 here too, except on snowy days and weekends, but DMW and I are a well oiled team, even outside the bedroom. It’s a very busy time in your life, but also very exciting. You are doing so much good work professionally and personally, moving your life forward. I’m glad you won’t be abandoning your blog, I’d miss you! Hugs and coffee 🙂

  • I feel for you. With marketing teams, reviews, twitter, facebook, blogs, triberr, graphics — arrgghh! Then there’s little people, big people, housework and no time, ever. I wouldn’t change it though. Things get frantic, but eventually it all gets done. Somehow, lol. P.S. What time do you get up in the morning again? I’d cry…!!!!

    • If I could change anything, it’d be more time to focus on the writing and promotion instead of that darn day job that pays the bills. LOL

      It does get done eventually…and I have to remind my impatient self that a lot. In a couple of weeks, I think I’ll be ready to start the next Sir and Babygirl book – and that’s with a ton of extra projects. I’m gonna call that progress! 🙂

      PS – before 5am…and sometimes I cry, too. LOL

  • I still think you’re dedicated. I love to write, but don’t make being successful at writing a priority. It stems from feeling it’s not lucrative (not just financially) or thinking I’m not to the level required to pursue it. If I do devote a day to writing, I can spend the whole day writing on and off. It depends on my mood really.

    • That’s why you need a publishing company – so YOU can write, and they can do all that other stuff you don’t want to do. Even though you still have to promote yourself…but that’s why you’ve got friends like me. 🙂

  • I’m exhausted!

    Just kidding. If you want to find out what a person loves, just look at where they focus their time. I can see your love, darlin’. You go for it.

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