Well, here I was, reeling in subdrop, forced to stay up and alert to do laundry, and what do I find when I log in to WordPress for the first time in a few days?  My first encounter with someone who does not understand BDSM and D/s and considers it something to be concerned about on my behalf.

If I hadn’t thought this person’s concern was genuine (although misguided), I would have been offended.  But I’m not.  I really do believe she meant well.  She just doesn’t understand that any type of sexual activity between two consenting adults is a beautiful thing – no matter how dark and dangerous it may seem to outsiders looking in.

I explained that I am happier, healthier, and less stressed now, after embracing this side of who I am, than ever before in my life.  But, the reaction I received to this post forced me to confront something I had heard about but not experienced – judgment based on assumptions.

It also cemented for me that I will maintain my anonymity with this blog.  If you thought my real name was Kayla Lords, I apologize for the shock you must be experiencing right now.  (I kid, I know it’s no shock.)  It solidified my thinking that unless faced with concrete proof that I am talking with someone who understands the lifestyle, I will not reveal this side of myself to people I know in my real life.

Maybe I should be more open and give people a chance to learn about BDSM and D/s – maybe I can be a shining example of leading a “normal” life and being a kinky freak in bed.  Maybe.  But I’m not interested in being a posterchild for anything.  And I have less faith in mankind than that.  Most likely there would be judgment, misunderstanding, and concerns for my mental health.  No thanks.

I am a live and let live kind of person.  What you do behind closed doors with the consenting adult of your choice is your business, and if you both find pleasure in it, more power to you.  I don’t have to understand it in order to validate it.  I don’t even have to care about it, quite frankly.  Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to finish dealing with my subdrop and continue daydreaming about all the kinky things He will do to me the next time we meet…

About the author

Kayla Lords

I am a sex blogger, podcaster, freelance writer, international speaker, kink educator, and all-around kinky woman. You can find me online sharing my innermost sexual thoughts and experiences, teaching other bloggers how to make money writing about sex, and helping kinksters have happy healthy BDSM relationships. I'm also a masochistic babygirl submissive with an amazing and sadistic Daddy Dom and business partner, John Brownstone. Welcome to my kinky corner of the internet!


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