I do not want to be the leader. I refuse to be the leader. I want to live darkly and richly in my femaleness. I want a man lying over me, always over me. His will, his pleasure, his desire, his life, his work, his sexuality the touchstone, the command, my pivot. I don’t mind working, holding my ground intellectually, artistically; but as a woman, oh, God, as a woman I want to be dominated. I don’t mind being told to stand on my own feet, not to cling, be all that I am capable of doing, but I am going to be pursued, fucked, possessed by the will of a male at his time, his bidding. ~Anais Nin
In places where I am called to lead, I lead. But when I trust and believe in someone who, even in his imperfections, does his best by me, then I choose to follow. To submit. To act as a supplicant.
But only because he is worthy of the honor.
By following him, submitting and serving, only then can I find the space in my mind and heart to grow, expand, reach for something better, and be more than I ever thought possible.
He does not make me do anything I don’t want to do, and he does not push me to do more than I am capable of. With his strength behind me, I find I am capable of more than I ever imagined.
I am not forced to me knees, told to bow, or made to submit. Each and every day, I choose it again and again, because each and every day, he proves he’s worthy of it.