Sex Writing

I’m Trying to Go to Eroticon 2017…But I Need a Little Help

Can I just say that for the first time in several weeks I’m finally starting to feel more myself?

Instead of the anxious-filled, numb girl who had to force herself to be even a little kinky (no lie), I’m finally beginning to see light at the end of this mental gunk tunnel and it’s not an oncoming panic attack.

I’ve got blogging ideas, plans for the podcast, and, yes, I’m finally doing more erotic writing and getting my ass in gear to finish the Sir and Babygirl series. Finally.

I knew I was getting back to my old self when I started asking myself deceptively simple questions:

Could I really start doing more in the sex/kink writing world? Could I really go to things like Eroticon or BDSM Writers Convention? 

For the past few months, I’ve let ideas and thoughts like that skim on by because even the thoughts seemed too heavy a load to carry. When I finally let myself think about Eroticon, though, I felt light and airy and full of hope. My optimistic side said, “Yes, you can do this. And you should!”

So I did my research.

Passports (no, I don’t have one; yes, I think that’s a little sad, too) take six weeks to get. Did I mention Eroticon is in London?!

The registration for Eroticon is reasonable and offers a payment plan.

Hotel prices are all over the map but Molly and her crew who are planning Eroticon are trying to help out with that.

Flights. Gulp. Transatlantic flights ain’t cheap.

Food? Oh, yeah, I should probably eat if I go.

The total cost is about $2000 – depending on hotel and flight, but I think it’s a safe number. I talked it over with John Brownstone. We don’t have room in our household budget and using credit cards isn’t an option for us.

“If you can pay for it, you can go.”

Meaning: Yes, have a grand adventure Europe, become even better at this sex writing thing you do, and I’ll watch the kids for a few days by myself. (Yes, he really is that amazing.)

I crunched a few more numbers. From some of my one-off, random kinky writing jobs (that we don’t include in the budget because we can’t plan for them), I have $200 or so per month to put to what I’m calling my Eroticon Fund. In six months (the time between now and the event – March 3-4, 2017), that’s $1200. That’s not enough, but it’s a start.

This is where, in my weird, rambling way, I have my hand out, hoping for a little help.

If you’re so inclined, and would like to see me get even better at what I do and share what I know with others, you can help me get to Eroticon 2017! And I have tried to make sure that, in most cases, you get something out of it, too.

Buy one of my books!

Ebooks range in price from $1.99 to $2.99. I even have a printed version of my last release, Kinky Love Notes. If you already have my books (and liked them) recommend them to others. Share on Twitter, Facebook, Tumblr, wherever you’re at online. Here’s an easy link to get to my books (and share online):

Already bought a book?

If you liked it even a little, leave a review wherever you bought it! Reviews help authors sell more books, y’all. And they’re like hugs. Big, warm, squishy boob hugs – which are my favorite kind.

Become a kinky patron!

I changed the set up on Patreon, and for as little as $1 pledge per month, you’ll get access to my books before they’re published. I upload a new chapter 1 to 2 times a month (no more than twice), and for each upload, you’ll pay your pledged amount.

If you pledge $1 and I upload two chapters, you pay $2 for the month. If I don’t write a new chapter, you don’t pay anything. Pledge more than $1 and you get more perks like free books and video content from me (with my happy, shining face and everything).

Join me on Patreon:

Donate to my PayPal

Is that too forward? That really does feel like my hand is out. It probably is, but I have a good friend (and podcast listener) who does it from time to time. I thought I would give other people the option. A few dollars all adds up, and it’s all a big help. This is awkward, but if you’re interested, here it is:

Want to help but you’re broke as hell?

I totally get that feeling. Been there, done that – would’ve gotten a t-shirt but there was no money for it. You can still help me, and it won’t cost you a dime.

If I write a blog post that you love, produce an episode on the podcast that changes your life (or at least your outlook on kink), or write an article anywhere on any other site that you think other people should read, you can do one simple thing that will help in a big way.

Share it. Tweet out the link, link back to me on your blog, share it on Fetlife. All of that really does make a difference. When you share something you like, people click on the link or look up the author. Not everyone, but I don’t need everyone. If someone finds me through you, it’s my job to keep their interest and make them want to read or know more.

What do you get out of helping?

I’d say the “satisfaction of helping out a kinky writer” but that doesn’t seem like enough. Will this work?

Some good kinky fuckery to read if you buy a book or pledge to Patreon.

Better writing, podcasting, and whatever else I may do as I learn how to do it better from other bloggers and writers.

My undying gratitude – no really! – as I start to achieve some of my big hairy ass goals/dreams.

Fun perks on Patreon. If I get to Eroticon, I’ll definitely do a video for my kinky patrons from London!

I’ve done the math. If everyone who subscribes to the blog, gets my newsletter, or listens to the podcast, pledged $1 a month on Patreon, I’d be able to go to Eroticon for the next two or three years. I know not everyone will chip in, and that’s okay, too! But if you can, I would appreciate it more than I can express.

About the author

Kayla Lords

I am a sex blogger, podcaster, freelance writer, international speaker, kink educator, and all-around kinky woman. You can find me online sharing my innermost sexual thoughts and experiences, teaching other bloggers how to make money writing about sex, and helping kinksters have happy healthy BDSM relationships. I'm also a masochistic babygirl submissive with an amazing and sadistic Daddy Dom and business partner, John Brownstone. Welcome to my kinky corner of the internet!


  • Hope you get there, Kayla. I’m looking into it, too 🙂 It’s a bit easier for me, though, as I live in the UK. Transatlantic flights are extortionate… would love to go to a book signing in the US… but not a goer at the moment. Anyway… get those funds and go 😉

  • Like Christina, I too live in the UK and hadn’t heard of eroticon before, but I’m definitely going to try and make sure I can get there. How could I pass up the chance to meet my favourite blogger Kayla, after all?!! I attended the BDSM writers Con twice in six months, August 2015 in New York, and this year in March in Everett WA. It cost me all my retirement pension lump sum, plus the sale of all my Swarovski Christmas ornaments, but I just about made it! I understand about the cost of the flights!!!! At least in London I only need to pay for train/coach travel, and hotel room and food. If you want to stick around for a couple of days afterwards for sightseeing or whatever, I’d love to join you. 🙂
    I will try and subscribe or donate if I can, but in the meantime I will continue to share your articles on Fb and Fetlife.

    Fingers crossed for you to come, and for me to be able to get there too. 🙂

    Anna xx

    • I have booked a double room at the Holiday Inn at Camden Lock. I am willing to share with anyone for half the cost, it you don’t mind sharing a double bed. 😉 I have booked Fri to Monday, (3 nights). I was able to get a ‘senior discount’ for the room, plus a discount for being a member of the IHG Rewards club, which has Holiday Inn in its group of hotels. Here is a link to the hotel and there is a video on this page of the Camden Lock area. It’s a bit fast lol, but there are photos on the site too. Here’s the link:
      If you can see my email, send me a message if you are interested in sharing. It will help you spread the cost a bit Kayla. 🙂

      Anna xx

      • I wanted that hotel but it was too rich for me. I found a hostel about 10 minutes away (walking distance) that seems MADE for a babygirl, lol. The rooms are too cute AND I got one with a private bath. 🙂

          • I managed to get booked at Camden bnb after all, and cancelled Holiday Inn. It was going to cost me £400 for three nights, which is too steep! The bnb I just booked Fri and Sat nights for a single room and shared bathroom, but for £120 it’s a better option. I have no idea how to get to the conference from there, or how I will travel up there yet, but will have to find out travel directions anyway.

            Hope you have a safe flight over. Looking forward to meeting you, see you soon.

            Anna xx

          • Awesome! Yeah, that’s why I didn’t do the Holiday Inn either. I don’t know how to either, but supposedly, it’s close – like a 15 minute walk or so. 🙂 See you in London!

    • Every little bit helps, especially sharing my stuff. 🙂

      Wow, you did make some major sacrifices to get to BWC! I’m hoping to go next August – assuming I can save/earn the money to go like I’m doing for Eroticon. 🙂

      I would love to meet up in London! 🙂

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