BDSM Info Submissive

He Smacks My Face, and I Love It

John Brownstone and Kayla Lords face slapping

When I saw this week’s Kink of the Week topic on face slapping, I quite literally squeed. This is one of my favorite things during kinky fuckery, and it hits a few buttons all at once. But I’m getting ahead of myself…

Face slapping isn’t for everyone. I know many people for whom it’s a hard limit, and I know quite a few who are intrigued but also a little scared. I’m not advocating it as a kinky fuckery thing for everyone, and even those of us who love it know there are limits to what we can do.

But John Brownstone and I engage in it as frequently as we can, and smacking my face touches a few of my kinks and fetishes.


I don’t like all pain, but the pain I enjoy tends to be obsession level for me. Spankings, face smacks, pulled hair, pinched nipples — when done in the right moment, they send streaks of electricity and pure heat straight to my cunt. My bones melt, and I’d do anything he asked in that moment. It feels that fucking good.

Being smacked in the face turns my cheek red and the pain blossoms out across my skin. He never smacks me so hard that the redness won’t fade, but while it’s there, I wear it proudly. He also has a tell that lets me know it’s about to happen. His hand cups my cheek, then he rubs my cheek — I unclench and relax my jaw — and then he pulls back and smacks. Unf. I love it.


It’s not something we play with too much, but I have a bit of a humiliation fetish. Some names — slut, cock slut, cock whore, dirty, bad, naughty — get me off when used in the right context and by the right person (named John Brownstone). Certain words are hard limits — fat, stupid, pig, cow.

For reasons I can’t always fully articulate, a smack to my face touches that fetish, too. I think it’s because it’s such an up close and personal thing to hit someone in the face. It’s degrading in a way. And this (beyond the pain) is why it can be a serious hard limit for many people. If I thought he didn’t value me, I couldn’t do it, but I know that he holds me in the highest regard (on every level) and I feel safe.

Impact Play

I’m a big ole spanko and I know it. I prefer deep thudding pains but some stings are okay. Being smacked in the face is a combination of a thud and a sting that I really enjoy. The thud jars the senses, sort of jostling your entire being down to the core. The sting is what brings the heat.

But it’s the impact — skin touching skin in this case — that relaxes my entire body. Even when the pain is severe, I respond as if I’m getting a massage. Well…almost. John Brownstone enjoys smacking me while he’s fucking me because with each impact, my cunt clenches around his cock.

Power and Trust

I’m a happy and proud submissive, so of course I’m drawn to his power — the power he’s willing to give. It’s not just a kink of mine. Our D/s relationship is absolutely a lifestyle and an inherent trait of ours. This is who we are, not a game we play.

That we developed the level of trust that allows him to take and use that kind of power is extraordinary. I can think of no other person in my life that I would allow to hurt me in such an intimate way. I’ve let kinky friends spank, flog, and paddle me, but only one person can smack my face. It’s something I trust him to do, and it’s a massive reminder of the power he has over my body.

My subby self responds by sending me into a light layer of subspace every time. My eyes roll back in my head, and I become a limp noodle. That’s fun during sex because it means I’m now only of use to him…which is sexy and powerful and kinky and All The Things.

John Brownstone is judicious in his use of face smacks and slaps. We don’t do it all the time, and we never do it when I’m hurt or sick. Frankly, he could smack my face more often, and I’d be happy. He tends to do it during penetrative sex because of how my body responds, but a quick smack on the cheek when I’m giving him a blowjob is fun, too. So. Much. Fun.

So no, it’s not for everyone, and that’s okay. But it’s one of the kinky fuckery moves that’s absolutely perfect for us both.

About the author

Kayla Lords

I am a sex blogger, podcaster, freelance writer, international speaker, kink educator, and all-around kinky woman. You can find me online sharing my innermost sexual thoughts and experiences, teaching other bloggers how to make money writing about sex, and helping kinksters have happy healthy BDSM relationships. I'm also a masochistic babygirl submissive with an amazing and sadistic Daddy Dom and business partner, John Brownstone. Welcome to my kinky corner of the internet!


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