Difficult Conversations in D/s Relationships LB071

Kayla Lords and John Brownstone host episode 71 and talk about a recent hard conversation they had to have, how it helped, and why these conversations are important in D/s relationships.

In this episode:

  • This week's episode sponsored by The Butters lube
  • Recently, I had to confess a few concerns and fears I had about our relationship
  • I worried that I might be wrong and would feel silly.
  • I worried I might be right and then I’d have to deal with the outcome.
  • He listened and we didn’t try to “fix” anything in one conversation. We came back to it later after he’d had time to think about things.
  • At the end, we decided to stick with what worked but promised to make changes if it became necessary.
  • It's better to talk about something when it feels small than waiting for it to become a giant issue.
  • Sometimes our head makes us think things that aren’t true.
  • We stay silent out of fear - not good.
  • Both sides need to be able to say how they’re feeling, even if it’s difficult, and even if it upsets the other person.
  • We got a postcard!

Our mailing address (for the postcard project) is PO Box 391, Crystal Beach, Florida, 34681

Links from the show:

The Butters lube - Use coupon code KAYLA to save 5%

6 Hard Conversations You Need to Have in D/s

Monogamish: The New Rules of Marriage

Postcard Shout-out: littlebownes and DaddyBeastie

Building a Community Through Postcards

Kayla Lords on Fetlife

John Brownstone on Fetlife

Contact Kayla Lords

Contact John Brownstone

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About the author

Kayla Lords

I am an erotic author, sex blogger, podcaster, freelance writer, and an opinionated marketer. I'm also a masochistic babygirl submissive with an amazing and sadistic Daddy Dom. Welcome to my kinky corner of the internet!


  • Just bought a second jar of The Butters. Left my first on at Daddy’s. Lol
    I also bought several other things.
    Thanks for the suggestion!

  • I have to admit I haven’t been listening lately. Just haven’t been in a good place.
    This morning I had a longer drive than normal (still not that long lol) and I needed something to distract me. I’m so glad I listened. I think just hearing you two banter back and forth really helped my mood. I was kinda scared to with the title. I mean if something ever came between the two of you it would break my little heart. Seriously I’d be crushed.

  • So I am stuck in a hotel room in Enfield with my Nikie noo, 3 dogs and I’m meant to be trying to switch off so I can go teach tomorrow , and what is naughty mouse doing?! Catching up on your podcast!!! (I will put myself on my naughty step!) . I am working on talking more , being better at listening and standing up for myself! My frenchie has also learnt to listen to the stuff I say with out speaking! We have rules about how I am meant to talk to people and how to listen , cos I find it really hard to do that when I get stressed! (Also I find understanding stuff some times as I grew speak Galic and Russian , my lovely bossman grew up speaking French and Italian ) . But above all , no mater how hard it is we just talk!
    Awdw x

    Ps -Nikie said to tell you that you and your daddy have very sexy voices and have made her horny! (She gone all neck biting, stretching and mewing!) so thanks for that!!!

    • Glad you are working on your talking, it is important for you to be able to express your feelings and needs. When Kayla and I first met I would have her writing things out to me and as she grew to trust me I began telling her to use her words.

      Did you hear that Kayla? someone thinks our voices are sexy.
      Glad we could help Awdw

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